Melbourne Dad Attempts to Dab, Tears Space-Time Continuum
MELBOURNE, AU – In a shocking series of events, local dad Mike Henderson’s attempt to stay hip with his children led to a cosmic calamity, as his dabbing maneuver tore…
Meditation App Disturbs Tranquillity with Mid-Session Ad Breaks
In the competitive world of wellness apps, “ZenMoment” seemed poised to rise to the top. Boasting guided meditations led by world-renowned mindfulness gurus, it promised tranquillity and inner peace. However,…
University Student Proudly Announces Minor in ‘Avoiding Real Life Responsibilities’
Amidst the sea of students declaring minors in Business Administration, Graphic Design, and International Relations, Jessica Dalrymple, a third-year student at Prestige University, has chosen a different path. Last week,…
Biden Discovered Laundering Millions in Literal White House Washing Machine, Aides Blame It on “Laundry Day Mix-Up”
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a scandalous turn of events that has taken the nation by storm, President Joe Biden was caught early this morning attempting to launder millions of dollars…
ABC backtrack on name change from Q&A to NQR!
In a surprising twist, the producers of the newly minted NQR News (formerly known as Q & A) seem to have taken a somersault on their commitment to “honest journalism.”…
Daring Darwin Divers Drive ‘Mud Crab’ LandCruiser Underwater for 7km, Redefine Navigation, and put Darwin on the map!
DARWIN – In a bold attempt to both rewrite the rules of navigation and to ensure no one ever gets lost on their way to Darwin again, a pair of…
U.S. recovered non-human ‘biologics’ from UFO crash sites, former intel official says… later determined to be cows that jumped over the moon and pigs flying
In a shocking revelation that’s sure to startle absolutely no one, a former intel official declared that non-human ‘biologics’ were recovered from multiple UFO crash sites. The sources of these…
In Bold Rebranding Move, Albo Joins “The Voice” to Sing About… Well, “The Voice”
In a shocking twist that has left fans both bewildered and questioning the fabric of reality, Albo, the renowned master of political messaging, has taken his talents to the stage…
Victorian Labor Government Conquers Gas Shortage By Banning It, Sparks ‘Electric Revolution’ in New Homes
MELBOURNE, AU – In a bold bid to address the gas shortage and flip a switch on sustainability, the Victorian Labor Government has unplugged natural gas in all new homes,…