SYDNEY, AUSTRALIA – In a shocking turn of events, local man Darren Jones recently discovered he’s 1/1024th Indigenous. Without wasting a moment, he declared his living room a “sacred Indigenous space” and slapped an “Aboriginal Office Space” sign on the door. When asked about his sudden transformation, he said, “I’m just embracing my heritage, mate. Plus, I heard there might be tax benefits or a kicker along the way.”